Cherished silence

"Cherished silence"

I believe that "I love you's" are sacred,
that holding hands is a gift,
and having a heart is a burden.
Smiles are accomplishments,
tears are my feelings,
and awkward silences should be cherished.
I believe people are addictions,
and bad habits are learned with good intent.
Maybe I love you all wrong.

                                     -J. Lajoie

Unwanted wake up call

"Unwanted wake up call"

I saturate my lips
slightly caressing my tongue against them
violently the images from last night
drain into my brain
like an unwanted visitor
I want to shut down.
If emotions were a color scheme,
the rainbow in my world would be 10 fold
the clock stares at me
like the people in class who think you can't see them
I peel the blankets from my body
5:06 AM, and I have already given up the day,
I miss you.

                  -J. Lajoie

Muse of your massacre

"Muse of your massacre"

Does it make you feel good,
to pick me up?
to act like you care?
to ignore me?
and tell me, does it empower you,
to rub her in my face?
to smile so innocently?
to tear me apart?
Surely it feels incredible,
to feel wanted
to enslave me
to ensure my despair
For me it feels like hell,
to be thrown away
to be insignificant
to be a ghost,
to be your muse for punishment.
 
                -J. Lajoie

So goes the day

I haven't been to poetry club at school for at least a month because of vehicle reasons... I finally went today and I managed to write three poems in a matter of minutes. I shall be posting them shortly. Enjoy my poetry spam :)

Power rangers unite!

I was pretty bummed earlier today, but I was actually getting over it (which is fantastic). What is one shitty date, compared to the endless possibilities I can enjoy out of life?
                                        I saw her at school and she came over and said hello... I said hello back and asked how she was doing, out of pure politeness of course. I am not a very rude person, and treat everyone with respect regardless of my true feeling towards them. After that it was the sweet sound of awkward. I basically ignored her and talked with my friends... because they were pretty pissed off with her actions towards me. ( My friends are the shit and for some odd reason when people hurt my feelings they take it to heart, like their feelings were hurt.. it is quite surreal ). It makes me feel like I am headed down the right path. Breathe of fresh air. I digress, there is a guy in my chemistry class that I have also had a crush on since the beginning of the semester, I know I know I am a crush slut. So I have decided that next time I see him I will flat out ask for his number and see if he is interested in getting to know one another on a more personal level. It has been so hard to talk to him alone, since we have class together and for some reason everyone in the class ( or maybe it is just in my head ) stares at us when we are talking. Drives me nuts. Like fuck man, just let me ask this dude for his number without your scrutiny. Hopefully I see him tomorrow when he passes by my work, that would be fantastic. I shall make my move then!

         Tonight I went to see the movie that I was SUPPOSE TO see with that girl. It was a good movie, Silent Hill: Revelations. My friends and I made a "bro sandwich". I really enjoy having most of my friends being male. It really does cut down on the drama, and it feels good that when ever they are down they come to me for advice or a shoulder to lean on. It is nice to feel needed.

Thank you, Mr. Picture.

Someday. But for now, I am going to enjoy being me and doing my own thing. I was really sad, but then I realized that I have so much to offer to someone. There is an entire world out there waiting to be explored, so much for me to learn. Time is the perfect remedy. 

So much so

I feel like that was kind of pointless... but at least I didn't back down.  I don't think I'll be asking anyone out on dates for awhile.