Dear A.B.,
When I saw that both you and nasty girl had the rings on I flipped my shit. I am stuck between this "is it just playing around" or "are they fucking each other now?" I want to punch things. You swore you would never touch her because she is gross, and now she is like your bff at camp. I can't do this... I thought, maybe just maybe we could be friends... but I don't know if I can do that anymore. It felt so good to finally talk to you, without crying or feeling broken. I wanted us to one day be able to sit over coffee, or a beer, or whatever... and be able to talk about what happen between us and maybe give us another go, but not for like months from now. I just don't know how long it will take to forgive you. And I feel like you lied now, by saying she was ugly and gross just to shut me up. You should have known.... you should have known that I don't ever want to be "just shut up." I want the truth, always. I've been through rough shit, I think I can handle you finding someone attractive. But for now it's hard to believe you wouldn't find me attractive anymore. When I was with you, I got sad about my weight but I thought you loved me at that time so I put on a smile and thought maybe I am beautiful like he says... Now all I see is an ugly piece of shit who can't hold onto anything.
I know I need to calm down... I no longer have the VIP access I once had into your life. But I'd like to think, if only to make myself not feel so terribly about it, that I meant a little more to you than someone you can move on from after a week.
Sincerely,
"I stay wrecked and jealous for this"
When I saw that both you and nasty girl had the rings on I flipped my shit. I am stuck between this "is it just playing around" or "are they fucking each other now?" I want to punch things. You swore you would never touch her because she is gross, and now she is like your bff at camp. I can't do this... I thought, maybe just maybe we could be friends... but I don't know if I can do that anymore. It felt so good to finally talk to you, without crying or feeling broken. I wanted us to one day be able to sit over coffee, or a beer, or whatever... and be able to talk about what happen between us and maybe give us another go, but not for like months from now. I just don't know how long it will take to forgive you. And I feel like you lied now, by saying she was ugly and gross just to shut me up. You should have known.... you should have known that I don't ever want to be "just shut up." I want the truth, always. I've been through rough shit, I think I can handle you finding someone attractive. But for now it's hard to believe you wouldn't find me attractive anymore. When I was with you, I got sad about my weight but I thought you loved me at that time so I put on a smile and thought maybe I am beautiful like he says... Now all I see is an ugly piece of shit who can't hold onto anything.
I know I need to calm down... I no longer have the VIP access I once had into your life. But I'd like to think, if only to make myself not feel so terribly about it, that I meant a little more to you than someone you can move on from after a week.
Sincerely,
"I stay wrecked and jealous for this"
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