My brain is going a million miles per hour. With out school work, my second job, and my friends at school.. I am a legitimate wreck. On the bright side I have be going to the gym Mon through Fri. Taking weekends off for work and what not.
Today I felt like an asshole. I am single, and have a child, which you should know by now if you have actually read what I write. ( These are the two things I tend to talk about the most lol.) I digress, my son's father's girlfriend (whom I actually really like, she is like the best girlfriend he has ever had, go baby daddy!), posted a picture of a bouquet of flowers and a gift that he (my ex) had given her. Mind you, I was not upset because he got her something and not me.... I mean, I wouldn't date him again.. like fucking ever. But I was upset that we had dated for three years and he never once gave me a Mother's Day gift. Also, I got really upset because she isn't a mom. I'm Mikey's mom.. like what the fuck? While they were having a super cute Mother's Day at his place with my son... I sat at home like a fucking loser watching sappy romantic movies crying because I am forever alone. Then the time came when I got to pick up my son (my ex gets him every weekend and I have him Mon through Fri.), when I got out of my car I saw my son holding roses and he said, "Happy Valentine's Day, Mommy!" To which his father and his dad's girlfriend whispered to him that it was Mother's Day not Valentine's Day. Wrong holiday little man. hahaha! It had then dawned on me that 1. These roses were from the bouquet that my ex gave to his girlfriend, and 2. I am a raging bag of dicks.
Seriously, she really is a mom, she has been helping my ex with our son for awhile now, and they are probably going to get married soon. Why not celebrate Mother's Day for her, right? And who gives a shit what he didn't do for me? I need to grow the fuck up. What they did was really sweet. Sometimes I can be the worst person imaginable. Someone I never thought I could be, some jealous spinster who sits at home at watches romance movies all day while crying into cake.... now all I need are 60 cats and I am golden. Well, I hope it never gets to that point. I just know that this is why I need to be kept busy with school. As much as a summer break sounded refreshing, I should have taken summer classes. I always forget, amongst all the school work with finals, that summer is boring as fuck without school.
Today I felt like an asshole. I am single, and have a child, which you should know by now if you have actually read what I write. ( These are the two things I tend to talk about the most lol.) I digress, my son's father's girlfriend (whom I actually really like, she is like the best girlfriend he has ever had, go baby daddy!), posted a picture of a bouquet of flowers and a gift that he (my ex) had given her. Mind you, I was not upset because he got her something and not me.... I mean, I wouldn't date him again.. like fucking ever. But I was upset that we had dated for three years and he never once gave me a Mother's Day gift. Also, I got really upset because she isn't a mom. I'm Mikey's mom.. like what the fuck? While they were having a super cute Mother's Day at his place with my son... I sat at home like a fucking loser watching sappy romantic movies crying because I am forever alone. Then the time came when I got to pick up my son (my ex gets him every weekend and I have him Mon through Fri.), when I got out of my car I saw my son holding roses and he said, "Happy Valentine's Day, Mommy!" To which his father and his dad's girlfriend whispered to him that it was Mother's Day not Valentine's Day. Wrong holiday little man. hahaha! It had then dawned on me that 1. These roses were from the bouquet that my ex gave to his girlfriend, and 2. I am a raging bag of dicks.
Seriously, she really is a mom, she has been helping my ex with our son for awhile now, and they are probably going to get married soon. Why not celebrate Mother's Day for her, right? And who gives a shit what he didn't do for me? I need to grow the fuck up. What they did was really sweet. Sometimes I can be the worst person imaginable. Someone I never thought I could be, some jealous spinster who sits at home at watches romance movies all day while crying into cake.... now all I need are 60 cats and I am golden. Well, I hope it never gets to that point. I just know that this is why I need to be kept busy with school. As much as a summer break sounded refreshing, I should have taken summer classes. I always forget, amongst all the school work with finals, that summer is boring as fuck without school.
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